Just when I think......

Just when I think I'm doing ok....when I think that life is on the up and I can begin to relax into the way things are, things change...and I don't like change! Once again I find myself feeling unsafe...the familar feelings of physical sickness and churning stomach return, and I am shocked by how awful it feels...I've almost forgotten what it is like to live like this. It is hard to explain to someone how it feels to find yourself feeling that your world has become, once again, an unsafe place...to explain the level of emotional distress that it causes. And so I feel cut off..separated from those around me. It is an incredibly lonely place, interspersed with episodes of 'normalness', as I try to push through it and still do things. It must look very strange from the outside. It feels very scary from the inside.....

So, this song is for me and for my fellow survivors....those who walk this journey with me...broken 'girls' and 'boys' alike - thank you for your messages of support.....